Well… It’s been a while.
Admittedly, I did find it quite humorous as I signed back in to write today that my last post was all about perseverance, and then I ghosted y’all for two years. Granted, that was not my intention, but still, the irony is not lost on me.
So, how does one summarize two years of their life? Chronologically, of course!
2024
The best way I can think of to describe 2024 would have to be: An absolute whirlwind.
Shortly after sharing my Solar Eclipse adventure with you all, I had a sudden change in my living situation. Going from almost a decade of living with roommates, to living with my brother and his family, was a huge change that was both a massive blessing and really challenging.
It was a blessing because I love my family. Getting to spend more time with them was wonderful. I loved getting to hangout with my niece and nephew and show up for them in little ways that I had never gotten to before. Whether it was helping with some late night homework, or watching TV together, those are special memories that I will treasure for years. It was also very entertaining to live with my brother as an adult because the experience had a way of highlighting traits that I thought were just unique parts of my personality but now realize, having seen them mirrored in my brother, are actually characteristics of our upbringing. It helped me recognize some of our cultural heritage: childhood recipes, movies, shared experiences, etc. Also, my sister-in-law and her parents are some of the nicest, most caring people you could ever meet. It was a joy to spend more time with them and get to know them better. And the Filipino Food her mom made… Oh my word! So delicious!
The hard parts were more related to logistics and internal emotions. Logistically, I had grown very accustomed to a one-to-one human-to-toilet ratio in my living arrangements, and moving to a two(or three)-to-one ratio was surprisingly difficult. Emotionally, it’s really hard as an independent adult in their late 30s to have to move in with family. There were a lot a feelings of inadequacy, because “how was I, at almost 40 years old, still not able to provide housing for myself?” It was also a challenge navigating the quasi-kid role that I had in the household. I was an adult, so I paid rent and helped with dinners, but I wasn’t a head of household. When you live with roommates, everyone has an equal stake, so everyone has an equal say. This was more like being a guest in an already established family unit. There, welcomed, and yet not quite fitting in.
And honestly, I think that was my own fault, because when there were struggles, I folded back in on myself out of habit. Growing up with my mom was a weird juxtaposition of independence without autonomy. Independence in that you had to be self-sufficient; Entertain yourself, teach yourself, comfort yourself, don’t be too loud, and don’t need too much attention. But at the same time, her house her rules, you don’t get a say, and your opinion doesn’t matter. So even though I know that my brother and sister-in-law are kind and compassionate people, and I probably could have voiced my struggles and been met with compassion and constructive conversation, I hid away. I reverted back to survival mode: keep quiet, don’t stir the pot, and bide your time. And if I am honest, I regret that I behaved that way.
On the positive side, living with them afforded me the ability to do some things I never could have otherwise.
Like… Solo travel in South Korea for an entire month!
When I say 2024 was a whirlwind, spending all of November in Korea was a major part of that whirlwind. It was a trip of firsts. First time traveling solo internationally, first time flying business class, and first time taking a month long vacation. It was the trip of a lifetime and I am so glad I got to experience it. South Korea is beautiful, from its robust cities to its calm countryside, and from its wooded mountains to its serene oceanside. It was fantastic.
There is so much to share about that trip but I can’t go sharing all that content in a summary review. You’ll just have to come back for that post.
2025
After such an eventful 2024, last year felt like a roller coaster.
The start of 2025 felt like a crash and recovery period. I had spent so much time and energy focusing on and planning for my trip to Korea, that coming home and not having a “next thing” lined up and ready to go was really hard. There I was, back to my day to day, working my unfulfilling corporate job, feeling like I had lost my purpose and clinging to the memories of my trip, while everyone around me was asking where my next trip was gonna be and calling me a world traveler. It felt like a major disconnect between the life I led for that month and the life I was leading in that moment, and I wasn’t sure how to process it (If I’m honest, I still struggle with it).
There were still a lot of travel highs to be had in 2025 though, don’t get me wrong. I got to spend a week in New Mexico visiting my Dad and his fiancée (now wife… so happy!!!), which was great because I always love getting to explore the “Land of Enchantment.” Las Cruces in particular has one of my favorite coffee shops with a gorgeous little courtyard (I end up going there for breakfast every time I am in town) and a cute little shop next store that sells the cutest assortment of items, from stationary to casual jewelry and a few home-goods for good measure.
California was a frequent destination last year for different K-pop concerts, an impromptu trip with a friend, and also my birthday (who knew a four hour layover in San Diego would turn into a whole birthday weekend later). It was encouraging getting to adventure through LA and San Diego for a couple of reasons. Obviously, it was exhilarating getting to explore, visiting the beach, going to art museums, concerts, staying in nice hotels, all things that I already love. But more than just seeing the places, it was a growing experience. I don’t know that I had realized the amount of fear I had instilled in me around visiting bigger cities here in the US until I made the choice to go. Weird right? I can spend a whole month on the other side of the world in a country where I don’t speak the language, but walking down Wilshire on a random Tuesday feels dangerous. But I am so glad I went, because it was definitely a confidence boost, to visit these places I was a little wary of and realize that I can handle those situations too.
The most surprising destination of 2025 though has to go to Des Moines, Iowa. Now, hang in there, don’t get caught up on the Flyover State status and hear me out. It was a bit of a spur of the moment trip, born out of the desire to not spend my entire weekend watching TV and a hunger for adventure. At 11am one Saturday morning, I grabbed my gym bag, told my brother I was going for a drive and that I probably wouldn’t be back that night, and headed east (That level of spontaneity is literally why I refuse to get a pet, I relish it). I wasn’t sure where I was going, but I passed North Platte (where my grandparents live) and as I was passing Kearney, I realized Omaha wasn’t far enough away to satiate my need, so I decided to drive all the way to Des Moines. So about 6pm, I booked a hotel, texted my family with where I decided to go, and drove the remaining five or so hours.
I think what I loved most about Des Moines was how it had this small town pace paired with a city experience. I got to traverse their river walk, photograph the city skyline, and visit the Des Moines Art Center. It was a beautiful, clean, and calm city. My only regret is that I only got to explore there for six or seven hours before I had to drive back home.
The last quarter of 2025 held a whole new adventure. In October, I moved out of my brother’s place and into a little apartment all on my own. It is my first time living alone (having always lived with either my family or roommates) and it has been an adjustment. Thankfully I am pretty introverted, so solitude suits me quite well, but previously there had always been a bit of built-in socialization, now I have to seek it out, and that is… Different… I’m working on it.
Living on my own has also required a shift in financial priorities that hit a lot harder than I thought it would. Living with friends or family gave me a lot of fiscal flexibility to travel that I can no longer afford. And I don’t think understood how much I had made travel a part of my personality and honestly, my identity, until I had to shift the entire travel budget over to the rent column. That move hit at the same time as some trips that I had planned earlier in the year (when I thought I would still have the discretionary income) and those trips lost some of their shine. I still went on them, but they were tainted with constant calculations (Can I afford the dinner? The hotel? The Uber?) and the looming shadow of knowing these would be my last travel plans for the foreseeable future, didn’t help any.
2026
The last few months have been a fight to climb out of that mental hole and I am still climbing. I have a small trip coming up that I am looking forward to (can you say BTS Comeback?) but am also in a season of evaluation. Gathering info, contemplating my options, thinking about my next steps as I continue to press forward and work on living a life that I enjoy and find fulfilling. I wish I could come to you all with this beautiful detailed plan of where I am going and what I am going to do with my life. I wish I had it all figured out, but in reality I am still working it out. In the meantime, I am reminding myself to be hopeful and persevere.
Ok, now you are all caught up. I am excited to be on here more often and can’t wait to relive some of those epic adventures from that last couple years.
Until next time.
Sojourn Nation 